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Psychological abuse – caught in harmful relationships | Signe M. Hegestand | TEDxAarhus



What makes people stay in psychologically abusive relations? Watch this personal talk from TEDxAarhus, 2019, where psychologist, Signe M. Hegestand talks about the unconscious patterns that shape our behaviour.
Signe M. Hegestand is an authorized psychologist, psychotherapist and Mindfulness Instructor. In her work, she has been focusing on psychologically abusive relations, because – as she says: “Psychological violence is overlooked, destructive and destroying.”.
In autumn, 2019, she published a book about moving on after a psychologically abusive relationship. “I want to raise awareness of how unconscious relationship patterns affect our love life, so that people can create healthy and loving relationships and nurturing environments for children to grow up in.”
This talk was given at a TEDx event using the TED conference format but independently organized by a local community. Learn more at Signe M. Hegestand is an authorized Psychologist, Psychotherapist and Mindfulness Instructor. In her work, she has been focusing on psychologically abusive relations for the last 5 years, because – as she says: “psychological violence is overlooked, destructive and destroying”. This talk was given at a TEDx event using the TED conference format but independently organized by a local community. Learn more at

#Psychological #abuse #caught #harmful #relationships #Signe #Hegestand #TEDxAarhus

Some Toughts (50)

  1. Avatar
    added on 15 May, 2020
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    Love died a lo g time,now am just in fear of the consequences….living in an alcoholic relationship…never thought i wld b here…

  2. Avatar
    added on 15 May, 2020
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    Women file 80% of all divorces and if she has a college degree then it's 90%.

    Just imagine premarital relationships.

    Women look in the mirror?

  3. Avatar
    added on 15 May, 2020
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    Amazing truth!

  4. Avatar
    added on 16 May, 2020
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    sad story. I am Advocate for the Abuse and Survival. I help women with relocation and how to make money Free. Please support

  5. Avatar
    added on 16 May, 2020
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    New world order needs to build upon CBT. We need psychological facts these facts needs to come out from books

  6. Avatar
    added on 16 May, 2020
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    I'm learning to set boundaries. In the process of setting and maintaining boundaries I don't care about those who are trying to show me a lesson.

  7. Avatar
    added on 17 May, 2020
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    just because men dont talk about it as much…doesnt mean they dont suffer from it as much….they do! do the researh….better yet….ask…there are wayyyy too many narcissistic women out there

  8. Avatar
    added on 17 May, 2020
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    This is a very common form of abuse and leaves mental scars for many many years

  9. Avatar
    added on 17 May, 2020
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    Attachment is a vey big problem as the result from emotinally abusive parenting and causes a whole hist of problems for future families and generations

  10. Avatar
    added on 17 May, 2020
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    👏👏👏👏👏👏👏👏

  11. Avatar
    added on 17 May, 2020
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    Awesome. I'm learning to say no and yes to myself. Enough with psychological abuse. We deserve better!

  12. Avatar
    added on 17 May, 2020
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    Any book recommendations for someone in this type of relationship and not knowing what to do next? This describes me exactly 🙁

  13. Avatar
    added on 18 May, 2020
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    Please pray with me. He threw my bags out on the streets Easter Sunday in covid and sent me divorce through email 2 days later.

    I want to get back in my home with my sons and I now have to go to court this month I have been married 22 years happily but this year was rough and I think there's another woman.

    He is pressing charges where he gave him so much emotional abuse. She is right is hard to prove. But it's there

  14. Avatar
    added on 18 May, 2020
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    sounds like the root of the issue is parenting – how people experience love and respect (or lack thereof) from the very beginning – which makes me wonder if there even is a way to fix this problem as a whole society. Is there a way to teach people how to love and respect their kids? God…that question is sad. I try my best not to make the same mistakes my parents did, but parenting is so damn hard sometimes. Having the parent perspective now has helped me forgive them.

  15. Avatar
    added on 18 May, 2020
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    This is so relateable to me thank you for helping me understand myself and why I am the way I am

  16. Avatar
    added on 19 May, 2020
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    I want hug you all I was able to leave a abuse relationship n domestic violence I have healed my self n strive to help other women do

  17. Avatar
    added on 19 May, 2020
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    So spot on!! 😊 I identify with this, one thing not mentioned that's true for me is that I also struggle with being fairly emotionally unavailable because my feelings were not important. Luckily I am learning a lot thought different 12 step programs. ❤

  18. Avatar
    added on 19 May, 2020
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    Very true and very good message

  19. Avatar
    added on 20 May, 2020
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    Excellent thank you

  20. Avatar
    added on 20 May, 2020
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    🦋thank you.

  21. Avatar
    added on 21 May, 2020
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    Stayed with a narcissist 12 years—5 months no contact

  22. Avatar
    added on 21 May, 2020
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    Thank you.

  23. Avatar
    added on 22 May, 2020
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    Or- “See what you made me do/say!?”

  24. Avatar
    added on 22 May, 2020
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    Thank you for this post.

  25. Avatar
    added on 25 May, 2020
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    Yes the person who cheated!!

  26. Avatar
    added on 25 May, 2020
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    Exactly, no physical marks

  27. Avatar
    added on 28 May, 2020
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    This makes me want to cry

  28. Avatar
    added on 28 May, 2020
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    Yeah… I don’t think I’m ready to hear this. 🙏😓 nobody understood why….. and I still don’t.

  29. Avatar
    added on 29 May, 2020
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    Can you tell me what other people said make you so sad? What is psychological violence at school? I need your help to know apparently about this matter?

  30. Avatar
    added on 30 May, 2020
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    Telling the lie on court documents that a mother has been hospitalised numerous times for mental illness when he knows that is not true after he was charged in a previous divorce for contempt of court is one extreme example of a psychological abuser who is like a driving rain to all the poor. Such kind of abussers do exist however family courts outside of the U.K. are not ever brought to justice and instead those who have been vicimized by that kind of emotional abuse before it escalates past the grey area to dometic violence are blamed for it all to later be lectured for the rest of their lives endlessly about how they need to change only because it is much easier for professionals to do so than confront and treat the abusers. So my ??? for all professionals including Signe M Hegestand who are working in the mental health field is, "How much are You all willing to do for love from now on too?"

  31. Avatar
    added on 1 Jun, 2020
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    I thank you very much for the inside look of how much this type of behavior affects some of the people that have been put through this. I experienced something similar and I somehow overcame this with a stronger will and authority against it as a result. You opened my eyes to the fact I may push against loved ones in my life to strongly because I was able to overcome and not see the fact some may not have. Bless you.

  32. Avatar
    added on 2 Jun, 2020
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    “How do you prove a crime that leaves no physical marks and the only witness is the victim?”

    💔

  33. Avatar
    added on 2 Jun, 2020
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    Story of my life dawgz

  34. Avatar
    added on 4 Jun, 2020
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    In my life, it's the woman who is the emotional abuser. I will say that nobody should have to be subjected to emotional abuse. She does it to our child too. Unfortunately, I am a man and have no legal options in this society.

  35. Avatar
    added on 5 Jun, 2020
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    lost met at 2:22

  36. Avatar
    added on 7 Jun, 2020
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    Perfect.

  37. Avatar
    added on 19 Jun, 2020
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    When ever I come to ted talk I realise that world is very big. I am happy to see there are people like me

  38. Avatar
    added on 22 Jun, 2020
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    thankyou what is the name of the book please?

  39. Avatar
    added on 23 Jun, 2020
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    This is happening to me right now. Im a man. My girlfriend is an emotional demon

  40. Avatar
    added on 26 Jun, 2020
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    I'm still going through this abuse …..I dont know what to do…I was being threatened…and I'm scared…. feels like I got to talk to someone professionally but couldn't do it

  41. Avatar
    added on 3 Jul, 2020
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    My girlfriend and step children suffered horrid abuse in a previous relationship for years and my girlfriend to suffer at the hands of her narcissistic mother and sister. I have been with my girlfriend for 3 years and still helping her not to say sorry for everything and helped her get over her dependency for alcohol.

  42. Avatar
    added on 8 Jul, 2020
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    Great

  43. Avatar
    added on 29 Jul, 2020
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    Im a man and an NPD survivor. I hate it when people act like it doesn't happen much to men. It happens much much more then dodgey statistics will tell you. I bet many men don't even recognize that they were abused psychologically and emotionally. My heart goes out to anybody in this boat no matter who they are. Light attracts darkness.

  44. Avatar
    added on 6 Aug, 2020
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    Anyone else feel trapped

  45. Avatar
    added on 21 Aug, 2020
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    Abuse can come from many sources – neighbours,' freinds ', employers, landlords & more.
    The emotional abuse, is most often behind my back, yet of it, I am aware, whereupon, it's returned to its generator/sender/owner.
    That sort of abuse no-one needs. Now, you have another way to rebuff, such abuse. 🙏☺️

  46. Avatar
    added on 3 Sep, 2020
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    I finally left an emotional abusive relationship that was almost 5 years. Now that I took all the courage to leave, the transition of being and finding myself is more difficult than I thought. He broke me down so well that I can’t think on my own. I feel guilt for leaving because everything I felt and did was proved to be wrong by him. I know things will get better from here but it was truly a traumatic experience and will impact me for the rest of my life.

  47. Avatar
    added on 4 Sep, 2020
    Reply

    I can't believe that just with a phone call i made to Dr. dodo , I got my ex back within 24 hours interval. I had read some stuff about Dr. dodo before i called him but i didn't know that all those stuff were so accurate until i got my ex back, After getting my ex back i taught it wise to share my testimony with every one on this website that Dr.dodo is a real and powerful spell caster that rebuild any broken relationship or marriage with love spell. Do feel free to Contact Dr.dodo via email: ( drdodotemple@gmail.com) OR what app .+1 (706) 871-4571

  48. Avatar
    added on 7 Sep, 2020
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    Thankyou. What do I need to day NO to for love. That was s shock. I'd never thought of that before.

  49. Avatar
    added on 9 Sep, 2020
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    Does it ever go away? the feeling of being scared all the time? Sometimes I remember all the abuse like flashbacks, does he ever go away?

  50. Avatar
    added on 13 Sep, 2020
    Reply

    Tesla referenced human energy 🌪👻jesus christ referenced living waters 💎🤍scscience described water memory 🌊👨‍🎓existence reflecting psychologically,psalms16:24 k,j 💎🤍👨‍🎓fight the good fight god bless all who been threw this or worse 🗽💞🌪

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